๐๐ง๐๐ฏ๐ข๐ญ๐๐๐ฅ๐ ๐๐๐ญ๐๐ฆ๐จ๐ซ๐ฉ๐ก๐จ๐ฌ๐ข๐ฌ
If there is one thing that I was sure of, the transformation was neither planned nor dreamed.
At least once in our lifetime, we are challenged to come out of our shell. It is a scary thought to step out into the harsh reality of life, but the impending light we see on the horizon drives us to chase it, and hope that beyond the white walls could be a better version of life apart from how we live now.
I clearly remember the days I was learning how to write. It was still the basic vocabulary; writing not more than five sentences and eventually complaining to the teacher that my hand hurt after writing ten letters. Yes, it was the foundation of all of us. However, who wouldโve known that almost 15 years later, you find yourself reading an article written by a once 6-year-old who even complained about his full name being consisted of 29 letters which was a hassle to write using a very fat pencil. Fast-forward to now, a five-hundred-word essay for him deems too short to be considered an article. That was I, the 6-year-old complainer who eventually became an avid writer 15 years later.
The amount of transformation it took have been massive. As I relive those days, I canโt keep myself from measuring how far have I gone. How many words have I written? How deep has my vocabulary gotten? How advanced as a writer had I become?
Eventually, I came to my senses to answer these questions. Simply, it was through the inevitable process of metamorphosis โ breaking free of your own cocoon to become the wonderful being you are.
However, becoming the writer I am today was not always the dream. In reality, I never dreamt of becoming a writer. I dreamed to become an athlete โ a football star following the footsteps of the Younghusband brothers who wavered the Philippine Azkals in the world stage. Unfortunately, my lacking height in sports as an elementary pupil degraded that dream, eventually leading me to find a love for writing stories about the football games I watched. It was far from the physical game, but it was close enough to enjoy.
In a broader perspective, what drew me to become a writer was not solely in my decision to pursue it. It was the eventual dismay I found in sports that led me to the vibrant realm of words, and eventually journalism. It was through an unfortunate endeavor that I found a better world for me to strive in. It was through that other world that I would eventually develop the person that I am today.
But how does writing come to concern you – the reader – as an individual? In a nutshell, writing was my main metamorphosis. I found dismay in sports thatโs why I shifted to loving writing. People tend to change for the better as time passes by, and it is through certain fields in our lives that we deem fit to change that we strive for it to achieve it. Writing was the bonus apart from the heartbreak I found from sports. Eventually, 16 revolutions around the sun would see me finding sports again. This time, the more extreme world of competitive cycling. Not to brag, but it was through cross-country racing that I fared well, bagging awards in my time as a competitive rider. It was through this sporting event that I found out how good I truly was as an athlete. Then and there I grew to love sports and pursued it. Now, I stand just to enjoy all the kilometers left that I can put into the odometer of my cyclo-computer. I went from a heartbroken Grade 4 wanna-be soccer player, to an esteemed Sports Writer, to eventually coming back to sports all the while developing the love for journalism.
In a more comprehensive viewpoint, changing for the better requires us to shed the skin that does not fit us. It is however pointed to the notion of seeking what is best suited for us. It is unhealthy to linger on the things that are not meant for us. We should not force to put on the clothes that does not fit. We should, however, look for the sizes that does. Finding what we really want and love to do is hard, but once we do find it, it becomes the paradigm shift we really need. The amount of elation we feel once we realize it is where we belong does not in any way compare to the melancholy of the things that are not really meant for us. It is the sunrise after a long night; the great beyond of the horizon we see while being all drenched in the gray atmosphere of our โwanna-beโsโ; and the hope lying past our distress, stating that we have something to love, something to enjoy, and something to be good at. If by any chance the things that we drop now are truly meant for us, then it will eventually find us again as time passes by.
For once I wanted to stay in my shell. I wanted to keep the dream of becoming the football player I wanted to be. But the heartbreak I witnessed in my efforts to join the said sport was too much that I eventually realized that it was not really for me. The challenge to step out was presented to me. The thought of surpassing the current version of I and striving to achieve a better version now lingered in my brain. I was set to challenge my limits; my cocoon was set to be broken. Eventually, I was a kid no more, but a person thriving in a world where diverse dreams were waiting to be achieved. It is a chaotic world but it is where I became the person I am today.
Other things are set out for us. Whether we like it or not, we will face a metamorphosis. Either we find something more befitting for us, or we force to chase what we deem is not meant for us, change is imminent and it will find us in all our adversaries. Through forcing, we will eventually shed off our old ways to come through with the new version that would greatly fit with the dream that we really want. Certain people have forced their way into the dreams they wanted, but for most, the heartbreak is too much. Letting go of the dream is not all bad. The bright side is that the probability of you finding what is really meant for you is ever present. It is not always a loss, but mostly a win. As they say, holding on to a rope strapped to a weight dangling on a cliffโs edge is more painful than letting go and allowing yourself to live.
